Thursday, November 22, 2018

When the Baby Missed His Bris

It doesn't happen often, but every now and then a baby misses his bris.

What?

Either his parents are just not thinking about it (fairly uncommon), or some medical conditions arise which cause the bris to be necessarily delayed. He could be a preemie, it could be a systemic issue, or things keep popping up (fever, cough, cold, etc) (we do NOT circumcise a baby who is not completely healthy).

Mohels have certain quirks - we don't do a bris on a baby who is under 5 pounds. We are hesitant to have some people play certain roles at brisses (depending on the venue, this reservation may change). And we really really don't like doing a bris on a baby who is over a month old (unless he was a preemie), who is past being a "new newborn."

I had it again this week. The baby's mother called me. "We had 2 and a half months of his getting sick, getting better. He has an older brother in pre-school who kept getting him sick. But he's finally finally good. And we need to have a bris done!"

How much does he weigh?

11 pounds.

Oy.

"OK. This is the deal. Your baby is no longer a newborn. The bris will be the same - everything will be OK. But his awareness of it will be very different from that of a new newborn, who kind of falls asleep when it's over and has a pretty good day afterwards."

I needed to tell her all this because her older son was 8 days old at his bris, and she needed to know the experience was likely going to be different.

And it was. But it also was amazing.

Yes, the baby was a little more aware. Yes he was stronger than a typical newborn.

BUT, the bris was actually quicker than usual. (For his safety I had him held on a flat surface rather than on the sandak's lap), and when it was all over, he was as chilled out as could be.

To top it off, he actually APPRECIATED THE MANSCHEWITZ wine in the way a newborn never does. He kept asking for a refill!

All told, I certainly find doing the bris on day 8 (or thereabouts for the occasional 1-10 day delay) much easier. And I certainly do NOT recommend pushing off a bris for an inordinate amount of time.

But if every 11 pound baby's bris went as smoothly as this little guy's did, that will be just fine.

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